There's this concept I have come to personify: the ugly ftriend. The one that's pretty...cool (outside the bedroom), and may even be attractive, maybe, independent of the others. It hit me thrusday and all I wanted to do was sit and cry. And consume all the booze I could.
It started thursday afternoon, when the cute boy at work started macking on my coworker. And I think she likes him back. She just broke up with her boyfriend for what could be the the 238,348,853,723,762nd time, and she's a vegan and I'm fairly certain that was Handel's Messiah to the boy's ears. So I was really upset by that. And then we went to the bar and I had wine and lots of other booze and I was starting to feel better but then all my friends kept getting hit on and I was like shit goddamn, I can't catch a break, and then I thought I was going to cry in the bathroom (my trademark, I'm startng to notice) but I didn't. I came close and then some girl came in and I have this complex about people seeing or hearing me cry, so I cut that shit out. And then friday, I worked withTheresa, who is my favorite. But she is gorgeous and all the students hit on her, even if they are old and creepy. And she's smart, and she's cool. We went to a party that night, and every one we went with was so pretty and I really just wanted to lay down and cry/die. The only two things those nights had in common were that I was there and that I didn't get hit on, which only led me to the conclusion that I am THE UGLY FRIEND. Everybody has one. I assumed it was someone else.
It really is enough to make a girl invent an eating disorder.
Smokerexic?
Whatever it is is going to kill me and they will have to name the condition after me.
I want to take drum lessons.
The only way to get over drummers is to become one.
This will not be cut-pasted into my myspace blog, because the persona I have constructed doesn't have these issues. She used to wear her heart on her sleeve and then she changed shirts. She rocks a little too hard, drives a little to fast, thinks a little too much and loves life like it's her job.
That's not me right now.
Monday, March 24, 2008
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